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A Harvard-trained obstetrician-gynecologist, prominent blogger, and author of the classic How Your Baby Is Born delivers a timely, important, and sure to be headline-making expose that shines a light on the natural parenting movement and the multimillion-dollar industry behind it.The natural parenting movement praises the virtues of birth without medical interference, staunchly advocates breastfeeding for all mothers, and hails attachment parenting. Once the exclusive province of the alternative lifestyle, natural parenting has gone mainstream, becoming a lucrative big business today.But those who do not subscribe to this method are often made to feel as if they are doing their children harm. Dr. Amy Tuteur understands their apprehensions. “Parenting quickly feels synonymous with guilt. And of late, there is no bigger arena for this pervasive guilt than childbirth.” As a medical professional with a long career in obstetrics and gynecology and as the mother of four children, Tuteur is no stranger to the insurmountable pressures and subsequent feelings of blame and self-condemnation that mothers experience during their children’s early years. The natural parenting movement, she contends, is not helping them raise their children better. Instead, it capitalizes on their uncertainty, manipulating parents when they are most vulnerable.In Push Back, she chronicles the movement’s history from its roots to its modern practices, incorporating her own experiences as a mother and successful OB-GYN with original research on the latest in childbirth science. She also reveals the dangerous and overtly misogynistic motives of some of its proponents—conservative men who sought to limit women’s control and autonomy. As she debunks, one by one, the guilt-inducing myths of natural birth and parenting, Dr. Tuteur empowers women to embrace the method of childbirth that is right for them, while reassuring all parents that the most important thing they can do is love and care for their children.
It has taken me a while to finish this book. Purchased it back in April and well, it's September now. A little back story about myself and then I'll get to why I loved this book. I'm a mother to six. I became a mom at 18 and had a wonderful 'first' birth. I kind of caught on to the whole 'natural' birth thing when I became pregnant with my second. I always viewed that birth as a failure because I was induced due to low fluid and had to get pain medication to help cope with labor pains. Then number three came around and I had the 'holy grail' of hospital births - no pain medication! Immediately after that birth, I watched the Business of Being Born and knew that homebirth was on my plate for the next baby. So that's what I did. Had a homebirth and well, everything turned out okay! It felt good giving the 'finger' to the hospital and medical professionals. I did it - without them - my daughter was born in a calm atmosphere - surrounded by love. No strollers, no bottles, never left her, no nothing because that was the RIGHT way. SO - hang in there - got pregnant with number five so it only made sense to have another homebirth. Saved up my money because homebirths are NOT cheap. This is when it came crashing down on me. It didn't turn out okay. My baby became stuck (shoulder dystocia) for over 9 minutes. The 'midwife' (I use that term very loosely - she's a certified professional midwife) eventually got him out and of course, no heart beat, not breathing, limp and lifeless in my arms - on the floor in my bathroom. My husband dialed 911 and luckily the ambulance was there very quickly - we live less than a mile away from the hospital and he survived. The hospital was there to pick up the pieces and save my son's life. I remember right after I had him how embarrassed I was to transfer - and then thinking - why and how did this happen? I thought I did everything right like the natural birth community says to do - I took all natural health supplements, was fit and healthy, went to the chiropractor, did spinning babies, thought positively about birth (heck, I LOVED birth!), had a doula, had a midwife, planned a homebirth - whhhhhy did this happen to ME? It took months to see that everything that was told to me previously was a giant lie. And once I got over all the lies, I quickly realized that nothing mattered except a healthy, living baby. I was so thankful to the NICU and the hospital staff who picked up the pieces of my homebirth ... I got pregnant with number six, hired a wonderful OB, and had a beautiful elective cesarean to ensure a safe delivery of my last child. I was always told that a cesarean birth is absolutely the worse thing to ever happen ...Dr. Amy is known for her harsh tone and perhaps, maybe anger towards the Natural Birth community. I understand her anger. I've been on both sides now and it's really frustrating. She isn't "anti" natural birth - or "anti" breastfeeding. She's against the lies that are formed around these communities. I have flipped through my homebirth book that my midwife gave me and it's incredible to actually see all the lies inside of it. There isn't any evidence presented. It's all opinions. No science. Just random things that random natural birth junkies have said. Dr. Amy backs up her stuff with evidence. Science. Studies. These aren't just opinions. This is a wonderful book to sit down and really THINK about what you have heard or been told by some people. I would highly encourage anyone to read this book with a very open mind and willing to soak in the evidence. Her book has made me feel better about doing REALLY small things that I used to think were terrible .. things like bottle feeding, using a stroller (I know, seriously), and even enrolling my preschooler into a two day a week Mother's Day Out program. All of these small things have made me feel so much better emotionally and mentally - I feel healthier as a mom and I no longer have this pressure to do everything the "right" way. There is no one size fits all - and she's right - the only thing that matters is the LOVE to your child. They don't care how they were born - what they were fed - if they worn in a carrier on your back or pushed in a stroller - or whatever else! I can assure you that my oldest son who is almost 14 really doesn't care that he was born vaginally or that he was breastfed. It's something that is never talked about - hah! I feel so silly for getting so caught up in that world - for falling for the lies - but am ever so thankful for Dr. Amy's book and advice. She really helped me more than she knows after my homebirth story went viral. She's an amazing person and I hope everyone can read this book with an open mind. She has helped me understand that roles of the medical providers in the hospital - and with her advice - I was able to have an amazing patient/provider relationship with my OB for my last baby.This book is really a breath of fresh air amidst the chaos of 'social media know it all's' who try to guilt trip you at every single turn in motherhood. Thank you again for taking the time to write this - give supporting evidence - for being a voice to those of us who can't speak up - etc.
